Friday, October 7, 2011

Do Morons Dream of Being Mindless Sheep*

From a press release I saw this morning...

"Have you ever dreamed of hunting waterfowl on TV with a professional sportsman?"

A "professional sportsman?" What? You mean like this guy?

I've met a few "professional sportsmen." And the only thing I ever dreamed about was getting the hell away from them as quickly as possible. But then again, I always was a sloth-infused small-time dreamer with no real vision, so if it's your dream - out of all the possible dreams in the world - to hunt waterfowl on TV with a "professional" sportsman, then who am I to judge? Reach for the stars, dude...

*With apologies to Philip K. Dick's corpse...


  1. That's actually #2 on my all-time dream list. #1 is to be on TV with a really old professional athlete who's trying desperately to look young and his stepdaughters who get massive amounts of media exposure for being the complete idiots that they are. My life would be so complete.

  2. Chad - right on. That photo would be great for a cation contest or a Photoshop contest. I dream of hunting on my own and not leaving my hunt in the hands of someone like this.

    Mark, that is the funniest comment ever. Made my day and now I must share it.

  3. During my years of earning a living in the fly fishing industry, I've had a number of experiences with a few people that are enrolled in some sort of certified fly casting instructor crap. The few I've helped with their angling share a common denominator - they simply don't know d&*% about fishing. Says a lot about chasing a credential vs. perfecting the end result.

    A few years back, I was steelhead fishing on the Dean River in BC. Along in the boat that day was a guy that had a long range missile for a cast - really extraordinary. He was there to provide my other companion with a casting lesson for the day. My guide, who is a really good friend of mine, and I were standing a few hundred yards up river. We watched for several minutes at the beauty of the other guides cast in perfect silhouette. After a few minutes of rest and entertainment, we decided to get back to fishing all the nooks and pockets they were bombing casts over. We landed two steelhead in a rock garden in the next half hour less than 30' from where we were standing.

    Moral: The closer you can fish to your feet, the more line control you have, not to mention contact with your fly.

    Some guides are fishy, some guides look good. Pursue the former.

  4. No, I wouldn't want anyone to show me on TV when I'm hunting... but then again, a chap I know, a pro outdoor writer, was HIRED to follow some guy on a dream safari through Siberia that must've cost in the six figures. They also took a cameraman and filmed the trip for a TV show. The funny thing was, the footage that was aired never showed the guy's face. It looked as if it was the writer who was doing the hunting. Talk about mindless sheep.

  5. I just want Roethlisberger to take over for Csonka. "Raping the Resource" would put the Sportsman Channel on the map.

  6. I find more ducks on the slough than on the TV.